I carried a cell phone around for customer service issues for seven years after I retired. It was during this period when the doctor decided they wanted to do a colonoscopy on me. The preparations were bad enough, but when I got in there, they laid me on a bed with a big screen beside it. I asked them what that was all about. They told me most people like to watch what is going on. I told them with my background I would be looking to see what is amiss or broken, so what can they give me. They gave me something I think was called twilight, and the next thing I know I am in recovery, and they say if I can go to the bathroom, I can go home. I finally succeed, and Marth drives me home.
When we arrive at the house, all I can think of is that I am starving. So, I am rummaging around in the refrigerator looking for something to eat, when that darn cell phone rings. Like an idiot I answer it. It is a guy who has bought a Suntec pump for his furnace and he cannot get it to work. Before I can even begin to answer him, he becomes a verbal runaway. He goes on and on and on, hardly pausing to breathe. I am going sir, sir, sir getting progressively louder. Finally, he hears me and says, “What”?
I explain to him that I have been on laxatives for three days, just had forty feet of camera shoved up my butt, what is his problem. He gets really quiet and tells me what is wrong. I quietly and calmly tell him how to fix it. He says, “Thank you.” I hang up.
I turn around and Martha is sitting there observing. She says,” You aren’t going to win any awards for that call.” I just said, “He got what he needed.”
